I just don't see myself being a stable, useful person ever. Day-to-day bill paying, hard-working, child-raising, productive citizen.

I've always had crazy dreams too, but nothing like this, well the escaping psych wards i've always had, but the being shot part leaves me feeling like, in limbo, and I can't breathe, floating but falling.

I feel like two different people, one's supremely confident and able to do anything, but the other can't even take care of herself >.<

i'm a coin that keeps flipping and I'll never give consistency or stability... which are necessary in my job field that I'm studying to go into.

My doctor is away on vacation until the 8th, next appointment is on the 9th or so...