I'm not sure if the position I'm in now is suitable for me. I'm trying to decide if I want to apply for a position that just opened up at my work. It would mean a pay raise. I would be a trainer, so I would be off the phones. (I work in a call center) This potential new job would include having me train the new employees through next March, in addition to ongoing training for the current employees. I just worry that my anxiety and depression would get in the way even in the new job, and that's if they hire me!

My current supervisor has started to ask me if I'm alright, if anything is wrong, etc. I think she may be noticing my anxiety while at work. She even picked up on it during training. I don't know how to hide it anymore - my last supervisor had too many employees to worry about. I was just starting to get used to doing my job after the first 2 weeks (with numerous smaller changes throughout); and now they have introduced an entirely new way of doing things. This new way is supposed to be the way we will be doing things the majority of the time, and the first way will be used as a backup. I wish it were the other way around.

So I am stressed all day everyday while at work. And I have a BPD mother that I live with and she is not speaking to me for going to my dad's for Father's day. (She's giving me the silent treatment) But if I got this job, I could start saving to get an apartment.

I am so tired. And my T's last day is this week. It's too much. No wonder I've just been sitting around all day, watching Mad Men on Netflix: everything else just stresses me out, so it's better to just distract myself.

I guess I needed to vent! Whew! Thanks guys.