I know the kind of job I want, no problem with that at all. I want a desk job in an office where I can be left to do my work. However, it's very difficult to get a job in my position. I have next to know qualifications as I wasn't in school much during my exams due to stays in inpatient units and only managed to sit two of my 16 or so exams, both of which were done in a psych ward.

Due to my constant relapses over the past few years I also have very little experience and haven't been able to tie down a job long enough to be able to use it in my CV. Once again cannot currently return to education as I would lose my benefit and won't be able to afford to live. So I have both qualifications and experience missing from my CV and no credible or valuable references.

There are 3 million unemployed here in the UK and only ever 1 million jobs going. It's difficult to get a job with a degree over here (not exaggerating in the slightest) let alone getting a job with no experience, numerous gaps in my CV I can't explain and very few qualifications. And to get the job that would work hand in hand with my disorder? Even more impossible.

So for now, really the only option is financial support from the government. At least until I'm stable enough for long enough to know I won't become suicidal and land myself in hospital for the sixth time. For me it's about finding some ways to cope so when I am well enough to go back to work again (with my consultant's assurance) I can hold down a job I don't like.

RB.