Just found out my ex husband was cheating behind my back for a year and half with his girlfriend while we were married still!!!!!!! I feel so dirty and betrayed. I have been trying so hard to stay off the couch. We have a horrible relationship. He is always backstapping me, hurting me and the kids, he lies non stop, . Three years I couldn't get off the couch because the shoe kept always falling, there was always .something bad happening I couldn't deal with. Three months im off, and im having a real hard time not wanting to go back, just give up, let him win, he always wins any ways. He is my trigger!!!!!! HELP HELP HELP