Thanks for the advice and ((hugs)) ...I guess I could try the screaming thing if the pillow muffles it enough. And I have trashed my room a few times recently which was strangely satisfying (until it came to having to tidy it or live in a depressing 'pigsty') but I guess better than making new scars...the only problem is that now I'm back home from uni, there's my Mum and brother to think of and I don't know if these things will really be appropriate :/ I have a doctor but it'll be different to the ones that I've had at uni...I guess I could do more mindfulness. There's just nothing that seems to satisfy the 'self-destruction' urge, but I guess destroying inanimate objects is the next best thing.