Was thinking about this 'homework assignment', my ob/gyn gave me, about thinking long and hard about what my decisions are on having more kids.

Findings:

--Have already decided that if I don't have a baby by the year 2015, that I don't want to have a pregnancy that goes past that one year. That would bring me into my 40th year.

--Mom said to me once, that she really regretted not having the entire female reproductive organ pulled, instead she had just ovaries pulled to begin with. 'Kiko,' she said, 'if you are ever faced with that choice, just have a hyst.' (Kiko, is my nickname by my mom, and rarely used by anyone, but her and just a few people close to her.)

--Knowing what I know about cancer, it can mastacisize. Seen it happen with others.

--Knowing what I know about this mark protruding from my cyst, there's no blood flow, no oxygen, it's not being 'fed', at the moment. Looks like a little stem. Asking myself, is this the point of origin?

--Thinking about women with breast cancer, and how full blown mastectomies can save lives. If it wasn't for being in the high risk category, I wouldn't have had this ultra-sound. Some spotting, in between can also be systemic of the pill. Which I've been on for prevention.

--Women, can achieve clitoral and vaginal orgasms, after hysterectomies. Clitoral, are my strongest ones, and usual ones, with or without a man. Some claim that orgasms can be greater after a hyst. And doing some research, it's the removal of the ovaries that can decrease sex drive, perhaps when I see my pdoc, I can make a case for Wellbutrin.

--In making the case for Wellbutrin, I feel that an anti-depressant, not only could help me deal with the emotions that are to follow, especially with pre-mature menopause, and help maintain a libido, but also, it can help me out physically, so that I have some energy, this thing, after all, coming down with it, could be what's draining me. And people with MS complain about menopause doing something to them. I'm making a case for a med, that I believe can really help me out.

--Granted, my next gyn appointment is the 9th, pdoc, the 15th. Pdoc, I can wait. Gyn, I am calling in the morning because these are the facts.

--Recovery period for a hysterectomy are 6-8 weeks. My last day of work for the school year, is this Friday, June 28. I have to report, back to work on August 28th or 29th. If I can get in, next week, the sooner, the better. I cannot afford to miss work, literally cannot 'afford' to miss work.

--I do heavy lifting, at work, not in the home. I can have a 'light duty/no duty' summer. My exh, though never, ever getting back together, is the type of man to help me out with housework and the kids. He also has three various weeks, this summer of vacation, the benefit of longevity with his employer.

--My ex and I have been trying to devise a solution to my father and his wife coming up on the 4th of July, this could do it.

--Another reason, no go on children, that would create a 4th C-section for me. My oldest was born, sunny-side up, and with a full head of hair and a fair amount of time in labor, my gyn, felt I could push all day, and nothing would happen, and he couldn't see past the hair to get a clear understanding what was going on. C-section and voila, guess what your son was doing, he was turned the wrong way. 4 C-sections scare me.

--My friend/back up sitter/fellow church goer, posted something on her FB, last night, while I was thinking about this 'assignment.' "Sometimes, what you are most afraid of doing, is the very thing that will set you free." ((one of those, need to, um, pray, and ask from that side of life, too....))

--if this thing is borderline or benign, won't need chemo.

--If I were a gambling woman, my money is down on the borderline one.

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Assignment, completed. Any stories on the after effects of a hysterectomy, less about recovery and more about that aspect, if you don't mind sharing. What's true and what's myth??