When I'm stuck in the relationship dynamics I had with my mother, I feel T is getting pleasure from hurting me (that's not whats happening) & I begin to 'fight' back.
When I'm in the dynamic I had with my father I tease T. I with humour twist things she says. It's hard for me to be serious.
Just last session I said I was going on a trip where a lot elderly people will be. I added with tongue in cheek "like yourself".