Hi Jilene,

The holidays are just hard when you've lost those that you love most.

I have had foot surgery twice in the last two years, and it was very hard for me to keep asking my husband for this and that. Your Mom probably just decided that one time she could make it into the bathroom on her own.

Part of the grief process are the "what-ifs". What if I had known she needed to go to the bathroom, and had been able to help her? It is very possible that even without the broken ankles, your mom would have died from the blockages in her heart. Please try to forgive yourself. Feeling guilty is just making your grief more painful.

Also the fact you were taking care of your mom full-time contributes to your sense of responsibility.

Your mom wouldn't want you to be feeling so badly.

I was in Israel when my mother died, but I think it was God's way of saving me from the phone call that said my beautiful mother had died. We are never ready to give up our mothers.

Wishing you a Happy Thanksgiving.

Feel free to PM me anytime.

Hugs,

EJ