For me, if I don't care, I don't even consider death. I just kind of go around inside this bubble of nothingness. Everything becomes flat, and I think I dissociate or something because it doesn't even occure that I'm alive or dead, so there's nothing to think about. It's more like I'm not even real at all, more like an autopilot. I actually prefer to be that way, it makes things easier since otherwise my emotions are so extreme.