sidestepper, I know how hard it is to know where to start. When I see so much to do, my mind blanks out. Try to focus on a small area, even a corner, and aim to finish one small area a day. You could also try covering parts of the room with a sheet so that it looks smaller and emptier. Remember that you're finally headed back to be around family again.

herethennow, I'm glad to hear you're still fighting, even though it must be so tough and it seems like everything couldn't be worse (why are they closing down the ward when the only alternative sounds horrible? Must be for economic reasons....). To you and all the other fighters on this thread, great big metaphorical hugs.

I do read all posts, and if I give you a hug, that's my way of saying I understand and wish things were better. I kind of feel guilty not responding to all posts, but that would get out of hand quickly, and I reply if I think I can make a useful comment. I guess I'm kind of asking you all to forgive me....

I've found out that there's a difference between irritated and irritable, and I was irritated today. My sister drove me crazy as always, but I wasn't angry and pissed off and imagining breaking things or beating people up. I was like that yesterday, for instance. Blowing up at small things. Could be my sleeping later than usual lately, could be meds, could be both... as usual, you can never really tell.