Perhaps your T doesn't like the word 'abnormal' because there is no such thing as normal. Have you heard of Michael Warner's book 'The Trouble With Normal?' I highly recommend it (it's not a therapy book, though). I think the problem with words like 'abnormal' is that they reinforce and notmalize arbitrary, cultural standards that are often damaging to those who fall outside of them. Normal does not just mean 'average' or 'common'; it's a prescriptive term that dictates how we SHOULD conform to cultural standards lest we be deemed pathological or socially unacceptable. That is why I view 'abnormal' and 'unique' as qualitatively different terms. For instance, one might view me as pretty 'normal' in that I am not mentally ill, don't exhibit any destructive behaviors, and can fit in pretty well in any social situation. BUT, get me talking, and you will soon discover I'm pretty unique! My T likes to tell me that I'm "one of a kind" due to my unusual upbringing, crazy young adult adventures, being a lesbian and fitting none of the stereotypes, and having a knack for adding sarcasm and rhetoric into everything I tell her (ie recounting my life as a novel/story).