No, I do not think a full frontal hug from T is inherently wrong. My T and I hug that way at the end of every session and it has been one of the most healing aspects of my therapy. I grew up without a mom and never received any affection as a child (I'm now in my 20s), so it's been very therapeutic for me to get that kind of affection and care from my T. In fact, the most powerful session I've had with her was when I was in tears and she came and sat next to me on the couch, put her arm around me, and stroked my knee. It felt like precisely the kind of maternal love I had never experienced. For me, hugs/touch in therapy have not led to either romantic feelings or dependency; for me, it has felt gentle and kind and it has filled some of the maternal "void" that was created in childhood. As a result, it's has made me feel more independent and behave more affectionately with the people in my RL.

In the beginning, I was the one who asked T if she allowed hugs/touch. She said yes. We haven't really talked about the hugs since then (2 years ago). However, I have told T in passing that my feelings for her are maternal (not erotic) so I think that eliminates the need for her to "check in" about that kind of an issue (though it could have been a possibility since I am a lesbian and she is bisexual). The only time my T ever brought up hugs was after a session where I left WITHOUT hugging her. I told her that the reason I didn't hug her that session was because I was feeling disconnected-- so we talked about and resolved the disconnection-- and I hugged her again the following session.

If a governing body like the APA issued a blanket policy like "no hugs in therapy, ever" or, even more ridiculously, "hugs in therapy must be shoulder to shoulder or one-armed or with 6 inches of space in between"-- I would find that very sad. I would see that as an outgrowth of the fear that any kind of touch or affection can be misconstrued as sexual. For some clients, hugs can be incredibly healing and, for others, they can be damaging. I think it should be up to the individual T and client to negotiate what is right for them. Unfortunately, like in your situation, your T was not attuned enough to your transference feelings for her to (1) ask about/address those feelings directly (2) ask you to elaborate on comments you made like "I want to kiss you" that should not be brushed off or automatically treated as a joke (3) initiated hugs without talking about them and checking in about them in light of (1) and (2), (4) when you brought up these issues to her, she terminated you instead of discussing them in a professional manner. Like everyone else, I agree that your T did not respond appropriately to your particular situation and needs. However, I don't think the issue is that she gave you hugs. I think the issue is that she ignored/missed your very clear signs of transference, didn't check in about the hugs, did not talk about boundaries when you made comments like "I want to kiss you" and allowed the flirtatious behavior to continue unchecked, and then terminated with you when you finally brought up your transference yourself. Unfortunately, these are signs of an inexperienced or poorly trained T. With more skilled Ts, hugs can be used therapeutically with clients who WOULD benefit from them. I think things like touch in therapy should be evaluated on a case-by-case basis by Ts who are skilled enough to handle sensitive issues.