[I can totally relate...diagnosed MDD for 20+ years and nothing worked. I wondered about bipolar from all the research I did but never thought I experienced the mania until recently when it got out of control and I had to get help. The moment my doc said lithium, I was ready to walk out. I pictured old time insane asylums..."One Flew Over the ..." type stuff. Once he settled me down and explained, I agreed and while I am no where near where I need to be, I am definitely on the right track finally. I'm 46 and believe I suffered since my teens though I never sought treatment until mid 20s. We just have to work with our docs, and keep the faith!