As for the whole "subject" vs. "object" thing I just really don't understand how to use those terms correctly. Let's just not use them.

I don't necessarily wanna call it a fetish. I only want a partner to engage in the activities I decribed in my OP just so that I can experience some variety in sexual stimulation. But thanks for saying what you could to make me feel comfortable with this interest of mine

As for condoms I will only use them with one-night stand partners if I choose to have any more one-night stands. A long-term partner must get tested for STIs and I will only be intimate with her at all if she tests negative. I really can't stand all the condom preaching. Elsewhere on PsychCentral I have seen people complaining about how much condoms reduce sensation.