I suspect I have DID and I want to do something. Yet again, since yesterday feels like I'm in a switch, and my whole head feels a different way.
If I had to explain why I know I have DID, I would say because I am so many different people and I feel like I switch, like sometimes I am one, and many times I am another person who is not me completely and then I stop. I feel broken, splintered in many parts. I cannot explain it better but that's the way it is. Do you feel the same way?

Today and yesterday were days I felt absolutely nothing. For me it's very hard, these days I was attending a course I really hate going to and it tore me up in two, switching everytime I went there, feeling like a different person, getting those horrible feelings again. I think that sums it pretty well. And I have the feeling that the pills my psychiatrist makes me take are good, okay, for some people, many people it might be like that. Yesterday I was reading a webpage on DID and it really convinced me, I have many symptoms of it apart from the memory loss (can someone please tell me if not having memory loss is the definitive proof you don't have DID? Because I read a lot of the memory loss thing, and that's the only thing I don't. I remember quite well everything I do. There's no part of my life I can't account at all for what I was doing. But it can feel distant, however).
I want, I need to tell my mother, the other day I began to, and I'm afraid that it happens again like it happened when i was 14. I ha dmore or less the same problems I have now and in the end, too much pain, I did nothing with the psychologist or with my life, yeah, my life improved somewhat, but in the long term I can see i did a few things wrong maybe.

Today I don't feel like myself. I've been trying to shake (because I get tremors and shake from switching) but sometimes people are watching and feels like, maybe, I don't have alters at all. I've been already in this thing of "being all okay" and not being okay at all. How can I explain people to which extent I am used to lying to people, maybe even to myself? Well, not to myself, but I spend such a big amount of time hiding. And my parents are the best people in the world, but they know nothing. I want to change psychologist so he can tell me whether I have did or not...because my psychologist doesn't believe on it at all.

i'll keep telling after, now got things to do.