I don't know what Aspd is. However, I am like you in thinking love is "making sacrifices for someone, putting their needs ahead of your own". My love revolves around feelings. If I love you and make a sacrifice for you that results in your being happy, then that makes me happy. I see it as somewhat selfish too. I am getting my needs met. After years of self sacrifice though, I need someone to love me in return. I need someone to be happy for Me! I need to receive the feeling of love too! Without receiving it for so long, my soil dries up and I become dead inside. When I have love in my life, it's easy to spread love to others and not care whether they return it or not. But when you have given of yourself over and over again only to be hurt by others, the love well can run dry.