I don't even know what to do anymore. I wake up every day hatingyself and my body. I feel hopeless because I want to be able to lose weight like I did 3 years ago but I am a failure and can't do it. I'm using food to comfort myself and for pleasure. It's like I think that food is the only thing that makes me happy so without junk food, i can't be happy. I was never
Like this before, so what the eff happened. I feel like a failure as a mother, that I'm going to eff her up completely and she's going to end up like me, ill never be able to forgive myself.
I've gained like 25 lbs in the last few months, I can't control myself and I don't know what ill do if I gain any more.
I went to work tonight and a coworker said I was depressing her, and she has never seen me so down. It's true, I've been in a really wierd mood today, I just wanted to leave, or break down crying. Don't know how I made it through the day.
I just wish I could take a medication that would make me not want to eat. I'm so fed up with my life. I'm so scared of screwing up my daughter.