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hamster-bamster
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Default Jul 06, 2013 at 09:50 PM
 
Quote:
Originally Posted by continuosly blue View Post
I just want her but she don't want me. She swears there's no one else. ??? Is 59 old ? She just wants to co-exist. I've threatened to divorce her but she STILL won't change. I'm done. Literally.
Threats in general cannot engender affection and desire, and threats of divorce are no exception.

Normally, when people do not have desire for one another but want to co-exist, they open up the marriage, because they do not want to imprison one another in this kind of existence devoid of affection and touch. It is a little weird that she did not offer that herself, because, it seems to me, if you have a husband who has nearly died many times and who has lived through so much pain, torment, hardships, and despair, but then has found a solution and has been awakened - sexually, you would rejoice and either praise God if you believe in God or just consider yourself and such a husband very lucky if you do not believe in God. You do not say to such a person - stop touching me and let us just co-exist. You might say "I do not want you to touch me, but I do want to keep living with you, and since you want sex, the only option for us is to open up the marriage so that you can have a lover (lovers) who would want to have sex with you, while I continue to be your non-sexual live-in partner. That said, I would understand if you do not want this kind of co-existence and would rather divorce me and find a woman for a traditional relationship in which people live together and have sex. It is your choice and I will respect either way you choose".

So to the extent that you might possibly consider making love to another woman, an open marriage and a divorce followed by a quest to find another woman are both viable options.

However, you wrote:

Quote:
Originally Posted by continuosly blue View Post
I just want her
To the extent that you do not want to touch and have sex with with ANY woman other than your wife, your problem does not have solutions.

Quote:
Originally Posted by continuosly blue View Post
The kicker though is that she also won't hug, kiss, or show any affection. Do hormones take that away too ?
No. How could that be the case if toddlers hug, kiss, and show affection?

***

even though this seems such a doomed, sad situation with the wife, I do want to congratulate you on recovering, and wish you the best! And, maybe you can at least masturbate now, although I realize that this is not a particularly helpful suggestion, since what stands out from your post is your desire to have a human connection, replete with communication, touch, hugging, etc. You do not seem to be on a quest for more orgasms, but rather on a quest for human connection mediated by sex.
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