Quote:
Originally Posted by continuosly blue
I just want her but she don't want me. She swears there's no one else. ??? Is 59 old ? She just wants to co-exist. I've threatened to divorce her but she STILL won't change. I'm done. Literally.
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Threats in general cannot engender affection and desire, and threats of divorce are no exception.
Normally, when people do not have desire for one another but want to co-exist, they open up the marriage, because they do not want to
imprison one another in this kind of existence devoid of affection and touch. It is a little weird that she did not offer that herself, because, it seems to me, if you have a husband who has nearly died many times and who has lived through so much pain, torment, hardships, and despair, but then has found a solution and has been awakened - sexually, you would
rejoice and either praise God if you believe in God or just consider yourself and such a husband very lucky if you do not believe in God. You do not say to such a person -
stop touching me and let us just co-exist. You might say "I do not want you to touch me, but I do want to keep living with you, and since you want sex, the only option for us is to open up the marriage so that you can have a lover (lovers) who would want to have sex with you, while I continue to be your non-sexual live-in partner. That said, I would understand if you do not want this kind of co-existence and would rather divorce me and find a woman for a traditional relationship in which people live together and have sex. It is your choice and I will respect either way you choose".
So to the extent that you might possibly consider making love to another woman, an open marriage and a divorce followed by a quest to find another woman are both viable options.
However, you wrote:
Quote:
Originally Posted by continuosly blue
I just want her
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To the extent that you do not want to touch and have sex with with ANY woman other than your wife, your problem does not have solutions.
Quote:
Originally Posted by continuosly blue
The kicker though is that she also won't hug, kiss, or show any affection. Do hormones take that away too ?
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No. How could that be the case if toddlers hug, kiss, and show affection?
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even though this seems such a doomed, sad situation with the wife, I do want to congratulate you on recovering, and wish you the best! And, maybe you can at least masturbate now, although I realize that this is not a particularly helpful suggestion, since what stands out from your post is your desire to have a human connection, replete with communication, touch, hugging, etc. You do not seem to be on a quest for more orgasms, but rather on a quest for human connection mediated by sex.