Bubata,

I happened on your OP accidentally, because I normally do not visit this forum - I visited because I wanted to review the posts on my old thread on which I asked for recommendations for inexpensive but fun perfume scents. But saw your message and responded. Now I understand that I really lucked out on you - you were clearly sent to teach me loving kindness.

Because, you see... your boyfriend was increasingly violent and even raped you on one occasion... so you would have been totally justified in calling the police and getting the boyfriend to go to jail... but you are forgiving and magnanimous in that you are not getting him to go to jail but rather are getting him to go to whence he came (a lovely word expression - a separate thanks for teaching me that)... in other words, you are releasing him neutrally into space... that is true loving kindness.

I do not believe in karma but were I to believe in karma, I would say that the good karma created by you for yourself in letting him go to whence he came and not to jail will manifest itself in good things happening to you in the near future.

Will write more later on the other aspects.