Quote:
Originally Posted by healingme4me
Sounds like your husband is really angry and hurt by your mother's lack of following through on her yearly tradition with his(and your) son and instead of directing the anger in the most appropriate direction(your mom), he's taking it out on you!
It's not fair, and puts a ton of extra stress on you, his expecting wife!
One expression, that could help, when your husband is in a more calm and stable mood,
When you mentioned dismay over the sneakers(can even use word for word what he said), it seemed like you were angry. I can appreciate that, because it hurts me too, that my mom isn't helping us out this year. I would appreciate a little less backlash for my purchasing decisions, this is also a hard time on me, too. I am pregnant, and the less stress on me the better.
If you do, berate me, over these purchase choices again, I will need to walk into the other room, or outside in order to ensure that I don't get overstressed. Then, when I come back into the room, we can discuss, just how we will budget this new expense on our budget. I do love you, and respect the stress you are also experiencing. ((or that last line, could be the opening to the conversation??))
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Funny thing is, my husband would get mad when she would buy him the sneakers or clothes or whatever. He would say, does your mother think I can't buy for my own son? There would be an argument and I would tell him that its something she likes to do with him what's the big deal?
Even for our daughter if my mom was out shopping, sometimes she would pick up a pretty dress or outfit for her and my husband would say to me we don't need your mother to buy things for our children. So when my mom would do it I would have to hide what she bought and pretend if he ever asked that I bought it. It sounds ridiculous I know.
I'm not sure what's going on in my life anymore. I feel more alone now then ever before. It's like I don't even have a husband. We don't talk, or communicate. I've been so depressed and I hate this feeling. I have no one so I'm always all by myself. I just sit and think all day long. Yesterday he didn't come home until 9. He didn't say a word either. Before I went to bed I said to him, so, is this the way it's going to be, your going to ignore me and pretend I don't exist? He said, I'm not doing anything, I'm just sitting here. I have nothing to talk about.
I had no fight left in me, I just said, ok. Then I said you know this is not easy, and I don't like living this way, just as I'm sure you don't either. We need to be healthy together. He just sat there watching TV. I said, its like talking to a wall. I then went to bed.
What a life, right? It's getting worse and worse. I feel like I've fallen into a trap. My mother doesn't care enough to put her pride aside and talk to me, and my husband is once again acting like a big child. So what do I do now? I don't have any friends. It's like I've turned around and said what has become of me? I don't even have a dog anymore because my husband thought he shed too much. Ok he did, but I was always vacuuming and sweeping twice a day or more.i kept up with it. So my mom took him last year. At least I was able to see him when I would go to her house. These are the times I wish he was here. He never left my side. It's funny to think that dog can be more of a friend then my own husband.