First, you dont' know that. If you actually knew the future and the outcome, you wouldn't even be here contemplating and hanging onto hope. Based on experience, most people have more rejections in job hunting than positive acceptance. It's truly a rare person who gets multiple job offers from interviews. That's a fact of life. All it takes is one job saying yes. Even if it is not this one, it's not the end of the world. Hang onto hope but don't put all of your hopes into one thing happening. You'll always be defeated worse if you do when it doesn't come to pass the way you are hoping.

Actually I do, because nothing ever works out. I was perfect for this job. Over qualified even, and because it was so perfect, of course it wouldn't work out. I heard officially today that I did not get it. That makes two years of constantly applying for work in my field, and not one job to show for it. I am now on year 5 of nothing working out in all the other aspects of my life. Someone I know, her favourite quote is the definition of insanity is trying the same thing over and over expecting different results. I keep trying to get ahead, I just get shoved further behind. It's been 5 years, 2 years specifically with jobs. At what point is it enough and I give up?


It is never stupid to hope. Hope is what keeps us from sinking completely and giving up. There is no wisdom in just giving up on something you cannot know the outcome of yet. So hang onto that hope. It will only feed your failure mentality and drive you further into darkness.

I held on to a bit of hope until I got the call today that I did not get the job. In the very minute before I got the call, I was praying to God to please, please, please let this one thing work out, for me and for my family. Pleading with Him over and over to just give me one thing. Then my phone rang, and I was told no.


No, she sounds like she made a choice and that is all on her. NO one lives up to the expectations does everything right. A true friend knows this and sticks around in spite of one's failings. Period. This is not a reflection of your worth but hers as a friend. You don't "win" friends, you don't buy them, you don't do things "right" to make them stay. They either are your friends because you are you or they leave because their friendship was based on something other than what real friendship is based on. Don't place too much weight on other people's staying or leaving to make you feel worthy or unworthy.

Oh no, this was all on me, and she has made sure to tell me so. I treated her horribly, and she gave me fair warning. She had issues in her life, yet I continued to act as if mine were more important and I fought against her. It is all on me, all my fault. She agrees, and so does a mutual friend. Yes, it was her decision, but her decision was made as a result of my actions. This was the first person who I ever felt actually cared for me as I was. My first and only true friend in all my 30 odd years. She was and is the one person in this world that knows me best, and she left. That definitely shows that I became and/or am unworthy.


Simple answer for this one. This is purely depression and your faulty thinking at work. Although I've been there and understand completely what you're seeing/thinking/feeling, truth is, it's not at all true. You have to divert your focus on things that are not failures and disappointments, but alas, we come to the root of the problem - that is changing your thinking which is what all of us are here for in the first place, so I'm not saying it's easy...

I don't have one thing to divert my attention to, that is not a failure. I often feel that if I had just one thing. One thing to hold onto and build from, that I could pull myself out of this hole. Unfortunately that one thing never comes. even when I bed and plead to God for it, I'm not allowed to have it.


The only jailtime you are serving is that of your own making. NO one is holding the key to the cell but yourself and there is no sentence. You will forever be holding yourself back as long as you look at it as if after you've beat yourself up you'll be better. No truly you'll only be more battered in the end, not happier.

I know that this is of my own making, but if I don't do it, how will I be forgiven? I have horrible guilt and shame over this friend of mine, and she will never talk to me again. I can never get forgiveness from her. If I don't do my time, How will God give me good things in my life? I haven't earned them yet, or I would have them.


Look this is not just someone with a lot of platitudes to throw at you and stuff. I have been through the ringer and have struggled on and off for quite some time. I do know how you feel and my heart goes out to you for the struggle you are in but I just tell you these things from what I've figured out and learned and have grown (or at leat for the most part) from.

I can tell from your responses that you have been there before, and I truly appreciate you taking the time to address my issues. In some ways, I know you are right, but honestly I refuse to accept it because then I will just think I deserve more than I get, and then I will only be more disappointed when I don't get it.