As far as I'm concerned I think it is helpful for you to be able to go on and on as you put it. To me this feels like a safe place to do that. I do it in my head around the clock but it gets me nowhere because I'm the only one who hears it. There is no one in my life who cares about how I feel but I can see understanding and compassion from so many here. You can tell that people are interested and care by the number of responses you are getting. Please don't stop letting us know how you are getting along.
I think it is wonderful you are writing the letters. I keep trying to do that myself but I can't seem to get things out right even by writing. Wouldn't it be nice if you added to them every few years or so as your children grow. Keep well and keep posting.