Well, I am a teacher, so I have the time off. I do have to rearrange my life when he visits. For example, I changed my schedule of classes while is here, and I feel like I have to find things to do to entertain him. Now, the time off will be more of an issue once I am out of the classroom and am an assistant principal. Instead of having almost three months off, I will have a month to a month and a half depending on if I work with elementary or secondary. Most districts in my area have AP's work a week after the teachers are gone and then come back three to four weeks before them. So, in essence, I will be returning to work the week after he's visited.

I do feel like he is running a guilt trip on me and he's not seeing my side of it. I do like the feeling of being needed, but not when it's to, what I feel is, my own detriment. We talked a little bit more last night and he's afraid I won't come back if I leave. Which is something I can understand because I have been giving off wonky vibes lately and he's seen the crying, anxious, panicky side of me. (It's not my MO.) He also has to understand that he is the cause of those root emotions. I feel better when I talk to him about it, but I really feel like I am just circular whining and beating a dead horse. I will just try to relax and see how next week goes, keep working with my therapist, and see where/how it plays out.