That's awesome, granite! I'm so glad you took the risk!

About ideas on how to not think about the mother.....that's a tough one, because ultimately it's about making a decision and following through with it. Maybe you can come up with some alternate things to think about to contradict or counteract the thoughts - like, things that bring you pride and happiness.....or actions to take that will help you when the mother comes to mind and affects your feelings, to get out that pent up energy.