I spoke with my half sister and she agreed to do the testing. It was a happy/sad conversation. We laughed, we cried, we agreed that no matter what, we are sisters, we don't care what the blood test says in that regard.

Then I called the lab. I was told in testing a sibling the % likelihood is minimal. We may end up with a result like, "there's a 60% chance you share the same paternal DNA" and the cost for the test is $900.

Operation: Sibling Swab has been changed to Operation: Steal Dad's toothbrush

It's very defeating. It took a lot of time and courage building to come to the decision of taking this test. Now I feel an urgency to get the results and it's at a stand still Dad lives 4 hours away AND I need to find a way to steal his DNA without him finding out.

It's making me reconsider talking to him about it. I'm afraid I'll cry. I'm afraid he'll cry. Our relationship is based on fear, intimidation, and survival, and I don't know I can handle expressing emotions around him or see him project an emotion that's not anger. He's also in a fragile state right now. I fear he's given up on life. I don't want to be the straw.

What to do? What to do?