How does one come to not hate who they are?

Not on the outside, but on the inside.

I have come to realize a lot of bad things about myself tonight. With everything negative I uncover, it is like the positive things dwindle and I don't know how to forgive myself for the person that I have been. Nor do I know how to control myself from not being that person anymore.

The guilt and the shame of that I have done without realizing my emotional state is overwhelming.