BP,
What you describe sounds like a mixed episode. Unfortunately, that is how most of my episodes are.

For me, I get so depressed, I just want to curl up in a ball and cry, but feel like a caged lion, pacing back and forth feeling like my head is going to explode. Then the voices start, and I just want to scream at them to shut up and leave me alone.

It's scary, and I wouldn't wish them on my worst enemy.

I do wish you the best BP, and I'm glad you are here.

Jeffro