Well, a barefoot (at least symbolically barefoot) pilgrimage across Northern Spain for a month, and, on your own, seems to have been a very impressive move (no pun intended) to shake the memories of him. If that did not help, then, yes, admittedly he is literally sitting inside your gut...

...I think it stems from the fact that he controlled your mind.

You wrote: "he basically made me accept a level of control in my life (regarding body, social life, fidelity etc...) "

So he forced you into something that was very strongly against your will (hence your word choice - "he ... made me accept"). So maybe you simply have not recovered your capacity for free will and free decision making. He is still controlling your mind, on some level.