I don't know if this is the right section for explaining my problem. I'm tired of the way my mother treats me and it has affected who I am and how I react to certain situations. I'm writing this after having several flashbacks to my childhood and teenagehood.

Since I can remember, whenever I didn't behave the way she wanted, she would fake she was possessed by a devil. She scared me to death every time, even though I wasn't a difficult child. We had arguments over small issues such as going to bed earlier, watching TV, etc...

She didn't stop bathing me until I was 13.

She made me go to bed at 9 pm until I was 15.

She wouldn't let me share a flat with other students when I entered college at 17.

To date, she doesn't let me wear the clothes I buy. At 20, she called me names for wanting to wear a sleeveless T-shirt.

She stopped brushing my hair at 21.

On weekdays I've started living in an apartment close to the office where I work, but she does not allow me to wash my own clothes. She let me start cooking 4 months ago (actually, I've been cooking since I moved to the apartment, although she doesn't know about this). People tell me I have to insist to gain my freedom, but I haven't chosen to live in this town in the first place (she forced me to join this company).

In fact I've been planning to move abroad for a long time, but she screams and fakes suicide attemps every time I mention my plans. She's sabotaging my life under the pretext that she had me so that I would always be by her side. Both my mother and my grandparents on my mother's side treat me like a teen or even pre-teen. My father treats me like a grown-up but doesn't try to help me.

I can't stand it any more. My mother is very sweet when I'm obedient, but she won't let me be myself.

What can I do to make her behave like the mother of the adult I am?