It is more than that.

Your wife lacks a moral compass.

A moral compass guides us in telling right from wrong.

Cross-dressing is not a crime. And I am saying it without being comfortable about cross-dressing. I have a wonderful colleague, Jeff, who is a cross-dresser who is out. He has:

- a childish face
- a thick black beard with a thick black mustache
- and, always, every day, a pair of colorful women's pumps that matches the color of his T-shirt. He wears bland looking nondescript men's pants, a colorful uni-sex T-shirt, and women's pumps that match the color of the T-shirt.

When I first saw him, I laughed inside myself - he seemed like a total and preposterous aberration. Over many months, I have talked to him a lot and slowly have progressed towards just viewing him a wonderful person with some quirks. And while in the beginning, I experienced cognitive dissonance between his virile facial hair and his wearing women's high heel shoes, NOW I experience more cognitive dissonance between his virile facial hair and his childish facial expression. But at any rate, I have been slowly getting more and more accustomed to seeing a variety of human tastes without thinking that people who have those tastes (openly) are preposterous aberrations.

BUT... even in the beginning, when I thought that Jeff was a preposterous aberration... I still realized that he was not a criminal! Cross-dressing, even in Jeff's case when he is completely out, does not render anybody a powerless victim.

To the extent that your wife was not able to see that, she lacks a moral compass, and this has already been established. Living with such a person is dangerous. Your trial separation might be a good idea if you want to dot the i's and cross the t's, but otherwise is not necessary.