got even worse.... cut 16 times on my leg wtf....
I was so dissociated that nothing felt real..
. so I got up off this chair, got dressed, grabbed headphones, cigs, camera... headed outside.. dusk was just starting and I played with different settings on my camera taking pics of anything.. flowers the sky.. cars going by... took appox 170 pics...
It brought me back to me ..
. now all I have to do is take my meds BEFORE I fall asleep.... I am still jamming.. but not in a self harm place