.... Well I'm 15 and already going to highschool and I just feel sad to know that I've never had a friend, ever, literally zero. Its okay now I'm used to it but I feel so lonely sometimes. I guess I just have something odd about me that people don't like? Maybe it's my pale skin, maybe it's my face or height? I look pretty normal no odd hair or any of that stuff. And I'm smart with great grades like most people in the advanced class I'm in.

Um, this is pretty long you don't have to read it the title pretty much gives it away.

I don't know, what's wrong with me. I'm always that kid sitting at the desk with empty desks next to her or around her in about almost every class. Or being cut in line so I end up always in the back no matter how hard I try. Yes I have been bullied multiple times and it hurts and still hurts so bad guess being lonely has made a lovely target.I never did anything bad to no one. It hurts when you got kicked out of an assigned group for no specific reason and the person tells you "don't tell the teachers though but just go somewhere else". Or having something you worked on for so long at 3:am and to have it torn and laughed at. It probably looks like I don't try or care but I do and beat myself over it. I sometimes try not to care and put up a fake smile but it later tears me later when I see people interacting with their friends or texting them on their phones and having fun. I just can't believe I never had a friend. It sounds odd. Makes me kinda feel worthless... And I often have harmed, but I don't do it anymore though. (Personal reason)

If you're reading this you're going "ugh another attention seeker on this forum" well then you're possibly right since I'm very lonely and downright depressed.

How do you guys make friends? Is it really that fun or worthwhile, I've never had any I'm serious I don't know

Sorry for the terrifying long post, just wanted to sorta vent what I had inside all these years.

Thank you.