Thread: moving on
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Old Jul 14, 2013, 01:36 PM
Elektra_ Elektra_ is offline
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Member Since: May 2013
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Quote:
Originally Posted by scorpiosis37 View Post
I read your earlier threads on this topic as well, and I really think that your T is making a valid point, as hard as that may be to hear. You've had some difficult life experiences that probably make you assume the worst about others, but you're letting your fears cause you to lash out at people before they've done anything wrong. You have a negative attitude and tend to accuse and insult people very quickly-- and that is what is driving them away. Did this guy want sex? We have no idea. But, had you talked to him calmly, openly, and honestly-- rather than insulting him-- you could have found that out and, possibly, been pleasantly surprised that he actually wanted to get to know YOU as a person. If you want to get into a healthy relationship (or just friendship) in the future, I think you might want to work on overcoming your negative attitude and expectations. When you just meet someone, those can be very overwhelming for another person and generally do not entice someone to want to get to know you better. So, you assume they stopped talking to you because they only wanted sex but, in reality, they stopped talking to you because you were insulting and swearing at them. That creates a self-defeating cycle. It's good to have emotions; the key is expressing them in a healthy way rather than just lashing out at someone who is not really the cause of your anger (because your anger pre-existed meeting this new person). I realize that if you aren't ready to hear this, you will probably just lash out at me for my post. But I've read your other threads on this topic, and I'm saying this in an effort to help you understand why this keeps happening to you over and over again.
if the convos always ended up in him wanting sex... what should i assume? he wants to get to know me? even though i told him over and over that there would be no sex without a serious relationship. i sent him a msg saying there would be no more sex convo and he said nothing and after that he didnt msg me for 2 days!! im a supposed to not assume he wants to get to know me?? and not get pissed?