I'm glad to hear that her license is current, she has good reviews, and she has 20 years of experience in the field.

I'm sorry to hear that you've been having such a rough time lately, and I think it's good that you are reaching out for support.

I still think it is a bit unusual that your T leaves it up to you to decide how many sessions you have per week and how many e-mails you send per day. I still think most Ts find it necessary to set consistent boundaries around these things, for the benefit of the client.

I can very much relate when you say that you are an intense person and when you dedicate yourself to something, you work at it tirelessly. I'm exactly the same way. I'm also a writer and an academic. What I've learned though, is that sometimes I can become too immersed in things, and work at them full-speed ahead... and that that ends up being counterproductive. That's especially the case with therapy. It ends up occupying too much of your time and thought, and it becomes almost obsessive-- which isn't healthy.I've learned that spacing sessions out, giving myself time to reflect on my own without running things by my T, trying different strategies in my RL and seeing how they work, taking the chance to confide and get support from people in my RL, and turning my therapy brain "off" and working, being with my family/friends, doing hobbies, etc. is all a part of the process of growing through therapy. If you try to rush it or focus on it obsessively, it doesn't work as well.