I was like that a bit in gradeschool. If I could go back and do things differently, I would. Here's how my mind differs now than when I was a kid that was on the "outside". (I'm not like that anymore, and although I don't have a huge group of friends, I do have a core group of 3, including me, and we don't hurt each other, ever.)

1. I would no longer care about being friends with the people that everyone wants to be friends with just because everyone wants to be friends with them. A.K.A - the popular group. Why would I want to be included in a group that treats people like that? When you all grow up, some of those people will be stuck like that! Horrifying for them (and us)! Some of those people will look back and say to themselves, "oh, how mean I was. Regret."

2. I would rescue more people from similar wrongs that are done to them. I can guarantee that you are not the ONLY person getting this treatment. Your task is to open your eyes and ears to see who ELSE is being treated this way, and then say to the meanies, "wow, you are really being mean to her. She didn't deserve that."

Oh, sure, you will take a bunch of abuse from the populars, but who cares? See #1. The cool thing is, you get to be the hero. And when you are the hero, people like you. You can even be a hero to a popular. It is pretty common for a popular to poke a jab and a fellow popular. You can say something like, "well that was rude!" Then turn to the victim and say "I think it's a pretty dress", or whatever they were getting poked for. Fun stuff.

The point is, you don't want friends just for the sake of having friends. You want FRIENDS. Those popular people aren't friends. It may take you a little while to find people that think like you do, but how will THEY find YOU if you don't put yourself out there?

There may be several people in the class that think the way your are being treated is unjust. But they don't say anything, for the same reason you don't say anything. Nobody wants to be shunned by the ones with power. But their power only comes from you caring what they think!

The best day of my social life was in highschool one day when at the very beginning of class as everyone was quieting down, I turned to the bully that had been tormenting me and gave him a 2 minute speech in front of everyone and the teacher too, about how unjust it was. I didn't cry, I just laid it all out there like a lawyer on behalf of my client, me. At the end, he was guilty. Everyone knew it. The teacher sent us both to the principal. He apologized in private and that was the end of it all. I think he grew as a person that day, too. I had a few friends at the time and we all got more outgoing from that day. As long as we stay kind and just, nothing can touch us!

Now, you have to be careful with this, because too much of it will make you hated. Sometimes, they need a dose of reality. But too much is a bad thing. The rest of the time, always smile. And don't look away from eye contact.