Quote:
Originally Posted by tangerine pie
I just want to make a new friend who isn't just talking to me because they're expecting me to take care of all their little problems or fix everything for them or give them everything I've ever even had like a doormat.
I think part of it is exasperated by the fact that I've developed some trust issues from Anya's betrayal, I'm sure, but I largely attribute it to just not knowing how to make friends besides being my kind self and doing things for others. It seems like when I do stuff for them, they see that as "oh, I guess I've hooked someone who will be my doormat and therapist forever, perfect".
I just want some advice, if any can even be given, about how I should go about getting away from these friends (especially considering I live with one of them) and getting new, healthy, supportive ones.
|
Sorry to read, that you've lost a friend of many years. It's relatable, how you'd become disillusioned with others, over this, and it also sounds like other's around you. Experiences like these, can breed cynicism. I can, relate well.
One, not need, lose their kindness and compassion, in order to not be a doormat, to others. It may, involve, no longer listening to their troubles, worries and concerns. Learning how, to say, can't talk now, maybe later, is an important step.
Friendships, it stands to reason, are meant to be reciprocal. And the people surrounding you, [or that you are surrounded by], do not appear to reciprocate the friendship. There's a give and take, where friendships are concerned. Takes time, to reach the point, of knowing who's a good apple or a bad one.
And, as a sidebar, really?! Upset over how many FB likes?! geesh!! *tossing my hands up in the air*
Hang in there, it takes time to grieve the lost of a friendship, and to recover from the betrayal that is involved in this particular circumstance.
