Based on the story about your late dad's picture in your wallet, the guy is not only completely worthless, but also without any sense of right and wrong. And, since he is in his 40s, he cannot be helped.

So you are wasting time and money to the extent that you are trying to prolong it. You should just file for divorce without further ado. The sooner the better - you have one life to live. He is dangerous to be around - people who do not know right from wrong at all are dangerous.

The story about his controlling your whereabouts (your OP) is innocent in comparison with the story about your dad's picture in your wallet.

The story about the dad picture in your wallet is SO telling that I would say that it was an unintended litmus test that the guy did NOT pass, so consider yourself lucky that you obtained clarity through that incident.

A 10 year old child with normal emotional development would be able to behave correctly in the situation with the late dad's picture in your wallet. So, to the extent that you are still having sex with the husband, you are - on a symbolic level - guilty of statutory rape, because he is emotionally underage.