So, that was the 100% negative version of your session. Let me write the 100% positive one for you, and then maybe the truth can be somewhere in the middle:

"It was so nice of my T to turn on a fan for me today in my session. She is so considerate to me. I'm glad that she has now set limits with me about emails which are for my own good, but she didn't get harsh about them, which was really nice of her.

My T is great at encouraging me to do things for myself, even when I believe I can't. It's caring that she has set limits about physical contact, but offers to do visualizations with me to help me calm down. I felt like I couldn't ask her where she went on her week off. Actually, I could have asked her, but it's not that important because therapy is about me, not her.

I am still learning to regulate my feelings about my T. Sometimes I feel nothing towards her and sometimes my feelings feel overwhelming. But one good thing is that I realized my real life connections are just as meaningful if not more. I am so lucky to have people in my real life who care about me, even though I sometimes struggle to feel that way. Also it was good that T moved the fan so she could see the clock, so that she could keep track of the time and make sure we could wrap things up well instead of ending in a rush.

It's great that my T got contacts and no longer has to wear glasses. I am still learning to adjust to it, though.

T is so caring to have hugged me and asked if I was sick. Even though sometimes I can't feel the connection with her very much, I know she is still there and cares about me."