Long story short, I'm suffering from depression which I have been told brings out my borderline traits (that I guess otherwise I can hide or deal with? Idk.)

Today my last friend told me she had enough of me and left. I can look at the relationship and see she was not the best friend (always jilted me for her girlfriend, didn't matter if she made plans with me, if her girlfriend wanted to do something she'd cancel with me and couldn't understand why that bothered me) she said I always over reacted to that, and maybe I did? Maybe it was all from the BPD, and really it is normal to be treated like that? I don't know.

It was not a healthy relationship. I know this. But it hurts so bad to lose it, I can't even think straight. I'm already suffering from depression, this is just fueling it. More people hate me. I'm more worthless. I can't have anything good. My life is a horrible mess. I'm a horrible mess.

I don't even know what I'm asking here. I'm just feeling lost and hurt and scared of how I feel and I don't know how to deal with it and I just want it to stop. how do I get it to stop? Please make it stop.