I have a husband but he is just a presence in my life that pays the bills and keeps me safe but I have not deep emotional connection with him. I feel so so lonely. I do not need many friends. I just want one friend that I can have a deep connection with. Someone I can be a little girl with...paint nails...do hair...have sleep over...go out for coffee and make fun of people that go by...go to the movies...shopping...explore new places. I just have a hard time connecting to females. I have zero trust.