Are you all living together or something? I don't know that anything can change if your boyfriend is willing to take you to such events, knowing what is going to happen? Why do you agree to go to places where his mother will be? Like hamster-bamster says, your boyfriend has to grow up and take responsibility for himself. It was/is selfish of him to ask you to go to the family BBQ.
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"Never give a sword to a man who can't dance." ~Confucius
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