I've been in a committed relationship with my boyfriend for over 5 years (I'm 28 and he's a bit older). I will admit that I sometimes have issues communicating but when it's just one-on-one between him and I, I sometimes feel like I'm talking to a brick wall. He may casually acknowledge that I've said something but he's not really listening. Then, when something comes up and I tell him that I told him, he swears that I didn't and that I have the worst communication skills. There are so many times that he never tells me things but thinks he did when he really has told someone else but it still gets turned around to be my fault somehow. He deals with a lot of people on a daily basis and between his kids, his friends, and his work, we never really have a normal conversation.

I get nervous around large groups of people, especially if I don't know them and when I open my mouth, stupid falls out. My conversation is like short spurts that don't make sense so I just choose to not really say much and just listen to everyone else. I don't have any friends so the majority of the people we go to functions with are his friends and I really don't have a lot in common with them but I just try to stay neutral and be kind. I'm a nerdy person that knows a lot about things people don't really care about and no one really goes out of their way to say hi to me and I feel like I don't fit in. After everything is over, he will ask me why I just stand there and not socialize with anyone. I tell him that the only reason that someone may say hi to me is because he is there.

I can rehearse conversations in my head about things and everything seems to flow and make sense but when I get in front of people, I'm like Raj with a girl and no alcohol (the Big Bang Theory). I don't like to be the center of attention and when I get into a conversation with someone, I start to get nervous and I use "umm" and "like" a lot and I hate that. I have no problems speaking to a crowd about a topic that I know about (like giving a presentation) but everyday life is hell. Any suggestions?