Angel dear. I hope so much that you can pull away from the precipice. One time I felt myself falling into the pit and there came a thought " I don't have to do this". I felt like I was physically preventing myself from going over the edge. It really worked. I gained control over the fall.
If you can't do it alone then please see someone for help. You may need it just for a little while. Why suffer if it is preventable.
Sending you strong thoughts of support and love