(((growlithing))),
When these things happen, yes it can be a flashback that brings on the emotional memories too.
Do "not" allow yourself to feed into the emotions where you feel like harming yourself or that you are at fault or so angry and lost you want to give up. These "negative" emotions are normal to PTSD, however, with time and therapy they "do" get less and less as you sort through how past neglect/abuse might have made you feel at times.
And yes, sometimes these flashback waves of events and emotions can feel as though they are happening right now and can be strong. When that happens, you need to allow yourself time to think about them, write them down, and you "will" slowly come back to normal where you have a sense of yourself in the present again.
Healing through PTSD does take time and patience, yes, at times there can be a lot of inner turmoil and confusion. However, you can slowly put it all together and finally, get the comfort, validation, and resolve you did not have in the past. You are not alone with this challenge either. Patience, patience, self soothing, self comforting, and talking these things that come forward out too will help you. Just do your best to try to "not feed into these things that come forward" but instead allow yourself to "observe" and learn from them and that you are simply now on a journey of finally resolving your inner confusion that you didn't realize was there in you.
(((Caring Hugs)))
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