Today was okay, last night was horrible. The meds really are working, because otherwise I would likely have been seriously depressed today. It was a small thing, you could say, but it cut like a knife. I got caught up in my thoughts, hated myself, felt I didn't deserve to live if all I'm doing is hurting the people I love. I would give my life for the people I love, and I mean it. It just hurt so much... if I was living on my own, I might have done something I'd later regret. I certainly considered it. But today's a better day.

Sorry for all you folks that are hurting; I know how you feel, herethennow. I worry that, like an addiction, you'll need more to get the same relief, and you'd put yourself in danger. If you feel that you're not safe, you'll have to seriously consider inpatient, even if the hospital isn't that great. You'll have to weigh your options.

tigerlily84, I know what you mean by car trouble. We're lucky here in that mechanics charge less, but this darn car keeps breaking down in some way or another. Replacing the tires, replacing the brakes, replacing the battery, replacing the fan belt... just lots of replacing! And there's a problem with the gas tank: we don't fill up the tank usually, and if it's on the low end and you're driving uphill, it sometimes stalls. There's a leak, I think. It's a 2004 car too, I think.