Quote:
Originally Posted by jmd7c9
I don't like to be the center of attention and when I get into a conversation with someone, I start to get nervous and I use "umm" and "like" a lot and I hate that. I have no problems speaking to a crowd about a topic that I know about (like giving a presentation) but everyday life is hell. Any suggestions?
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It seems to me that the difference has to do with what/who is the focus of communication.
When you speak to a crowd (you realize that it is not straightforward or trivial for most people to speak to a crowd, right? it requires poise, confidence, presence of mind, etc. Sometimes people get stage fright even though they are not normally socially anxious)...
...about the topic you are a subject matter expert on, the focus is...
on the TOPIC...
...and not on YOU... (caveat: not ONLY on YOU)
So you are Ok and you feel comfortable and even enjoy it.
But in informal one-on-ones, you dislike being the center of attention.
It seems to me that if you can think of TOPICS for small talk, so that the focus is shifted from YOU onto SOMETHING OF GENERAL INTEREST, you might be able to tolerate small talk as well.