Quote:
Originally Posted by Vnin5
I've seen my family's physician before... I've been on medication for depression at one point, and for ADD at another time...
both times I would wind up eventually forgetting to take them, or not having enough money to fill the prescription, or... well, they just wound up feeling like they didn't do anything?...
It feels like I'd wind up going in there, and being told off for having not followed through with any of my old stuff, when I promised to at least go in for a checkup now and then...
Generally at home, I tend to hide in my room most of the time, I feel that every time I'm outside of my room I'm getting severely judged by my parents, who are on me about losing weight, getting a job, doing more around the house (recently been told that if I don't have a job, my full time job should be spending 8 hours a day helping around the house...), and getting my driver's license...
I simply can't talk to my parents about these issues, the thought that they'd find out I'm thinking of these things absolutely terrifies me... the last time I wound up having a panic attack, they screamed at me asking why I was crying, and got even more angry and just kept yelling... they're not exactly sympathetic...
Sometimes I wind up not eating... when I make food for myself, my mother will frequently make comments, facial gestures, etc. about what I choose to eat... which I've never found to be that bad, I don't eat excessively large portions, or very unhealthy food, but they've been on a diet fad for a while, and have been severely judgmental towards these things...
when I "sense" that there's any sort of reason why my parents are upset, the pressure is so unsettling I simply can't eat, I can't stomach things, and I wind up trying to avoid it altogether...
|
I am going to address, what I boldly highlighted, first. Most doctors are trained in logical thinking, it's part of their career path. When they hand in their final thesis/dissertation/report, they are grilled by a team of professors in their field. Not being rationally sound, can make or break that chance for that degree. With that, being said, I don't feel, they will sit there and feel that you broke any promises to them. They probably won't even realize, that much time has passed, since your last visit, until they look at the charts. They are usually, that busy.
One thing, you could do, and I'm sure, there are people who've done this, is just print up, what you've typed up, here, even and hand it to them to read. Not everyone, feels comfortable, talking it out loud.
There are ways, to remember to take your meds. There's even phone apps out there, for stuff like this, now. Perhaps, the meds didn't feel like they consistently worked before, because if you miss a dose, it loses efficacy. You wouldn't be the first person to have done this, before.
They may, mention, or quizzically ask you, what's taken so long, to return, I personally, feel, it's a matter of feeling you out, to make sure and see if everything is OK in your life. That's my personal impression on the questions. And sometimes, I feel, personally, it's similar to a physical reflex test. Not meant to make you feel guilty, but part of the overall examination of what's going on with you.
It's disheartening, to read that there is such commenting about your eating and pressure for a drivers license and job, etc. 8 hours of housework, to offset not being gainfully employed?
It's no wonder, you don't want to come out of your room.
There's some forums, on this site, about work, careers, schooling, etc. Have you checked them out? Maybe, others, who struggle, like yourself, could give you some tips, etc on helping you get to where you need to get, to gain your independence?