i'm sorry your doctor responded that way ... i think (and would hope) that he was trying to encourage you by lightening things up as you mentioned; but it was actually tactless and very hurtful, as well as being inappropriate. I've worked with someone like that who has a great sense of humour which has helped me in the past but occasionally I've really been stung by it when I needed understanding and comfort instead ... as you do in relation to your friend Are you able to talk about these things with your S/O at all?