been there, done that. i'm sorry that you're going through it. i can't BELIEVE that you paid for her clandestine evening! that took balls!

i'd insist upon marriage counseling or else. i'm sure there's more to the story, but just from the facts that you presented, it wouldn't hurt for you to have someone to both share your feelings with. you might find out some things that would help both of you.......xoxoxo pat